Happy Thanksgiving, Julian Worrell

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Thanksgiving Wish

November 18, 2015

Dear Julian,

If I have to pick one thing to be grateful for and give thanks in this world, it is the God-given gift of you and your life.  I love you more than anything in this whole world.

Another Thanksgiving season is upon us.  My wish for you is to find your way home to your real Mommy as soon as possible.  With most things, time heals, but not this heartache, the heartache of not being able to see or speak to one’s only child.  I wonder what it is like for you.  I find myself thinking about all the arts and crafts I have missed out on for grades kindergarten through your current third grade on holidays like Thanksgiving.  I think about how you have to bring home the artsy crafts you make around holidays like Thanksgiving at school to a mommy who is just playing pretend while your real mommy waits for you and cries day and night.  Schoolbuses go by every day, all the time, but you are never on any of them.  I have to hear “Happy Thanksgiving” and “Merry Christmas” another thousand times this season, or so it seems, but all the while knowing it will never ever be happy again without you.  So this is the best I can do for you this holiday season.  I wish you another “Happy Thanksgiving” while you are taught to “grieve for the loss of Mommy” while you and I are both still alive, but from the Internet.  I hope and pray that you have found all these messages I post for you.  You will be nine years old in just a couple months.  I can’t believe it will be four years you have had to live without me in May.  This is such a waste.  Those who kidnapped you are probably celebrating and feasting all the while.  Frankly, it makes me sick.  We can only pray for God’s justice this Thanksgiving, and that we get to see it in this lifetime.

Love always,

Your real Mommy,

“joni faith saloom”

P.S.  I see from Ms. McCalip’s site that you had the wonderful opportunity to explore The Boxcar Children series of books in school this year.  It is interesting that Mommy used to read these same stories to you before you even began school.  We also worked on a map project together before you ever started school. Now, I see that you are studying maps in third grade.  It looks like you were very prepared, especially since we used to read The Boxcar Children out loud.I see that you were to present a book report on one of the books in the series.  Mommy was always a writer, and also used to be a middle and high school English teacher.  We know who should be involved in your life, but who is being unconstitutionally shut-out by vindictive and retaliatory individuals.  I was also pleased to see that you have also had the opportunity to read The Constitution for the United States of America and its Preamble from the same site.  Study this well, my dear Julian.  As happy as I am and thankful that you get to read these wonderful works, I must admit that it is such a bittersweet feeling knowing that I should be there reading and writing with you.  I can’t even think about how we have missed Writer’s Workshop together.  This is unthinkable. It makes me physically ill to know what has been (wrongfully) stolen from us, and over-and-over again.   I wonder how you feel when everyone else gets to write about their real mommies and daddies, but you have to wonder about yours and can’t answer normal questions about your life and where you come from for fear of lawless criminals with badges, guns, and who preside over a fake bench in a fake court of law.  You must know that is not normal behavior, and especially not for grown adults.

Thanksgiving.5

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